No Carrier Signal Detected

Logic is a systematic method of coming to the wrong conclusion with confidence.

You know that scene in the Matrix where Neo needs to learn Kung Fu, so they load in a disk, hit a button, and within a few moments Kung Fu is loaded into his brain via the Matrix?

Maybe that’s science-fiction, but its not that far off from reality. The other day I needed to strip some wallpaper, but I didn’t know how. So I pulled up Google, typed “how to strip wallpaper” and within a few moments, I was happily stripping wallpaper.
That’s what the Internet is. It’s the Matrix, and I am Neo, see?

OK, maybe that last statement is going a little too far, but the point is: the Internet is good… and I don’t have it.

The attention span of a computer is only as long as it electrical cord.

Last night the cable modem died. I called up tech support, and they confirmed it. My options were to wait for a technician to come by my place on Saturday (doesn’t work because I’ll be on my way to Canada) or bring the modem in to be replaced. Since I’m bringing the modem in to cancel our service in two weeks anyway, I decided to just cancel it now. No Internet for me…

I really could only use it on weekends anyway, since I don’t have a computer at home now. But at least during the week I could play games on XBox Live, or download shows to watch from the Marketplace. And now there’ll be no Skyping my wife and kids on weekends when I do have a computer around.

Technology is dominated by those who manage what they do not understand.

Of course I still have the iPhone, in case I need to download any apartment repair information into my brain, but the Edge network is oh so slow.

To top all that off, the I.T. folks at work have decided to block Facebook and Digg, on even the most tolerant of proxies. I had a carefully constructed PAC file that redirected my browser to the right proxy, based on what site I was after, bouncing around the internal network to get me what I wanted, but apparently they’ve caught on, because none of the proxies work this morning.

Blocking Facebook is understandable — there’s really no business purpose for it. But blocking Digg… that’s just mean. Not only is there occasionally some good tech tips there, but now what am I supposed to do on my lunch hour?!

If there is a possibility of several things going wrong the one that will cause the most damage will be the one to go wrong.

So now not only am I living on my own, separated by hundreds of miles from my family, but now I’m mostly disconnected from the online world. I am like Neo — all of my powers only work inside the Matrix! And people keep pulling the plugs!

I feel very alone. I think I’ll go to Walmart and pretend I have a reason to be there, other than to be around people…

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