I’ve done my best not to talk about it, because the Bible is pretty clear that were not supposed to make a big of doing it, but for the past 3 weeks we’ve been fasting. And not just Nicole and I — most of our church has been on a Daniel Fast. In general this means that we don’t eat meat, dairy, bread, sugar, caffeine, salt, pasta… pretty much anything good. Nic and I have been doing a slightly modified version — she’s breast feeding Benjamin, so she kept poultry, and leaving milk out of my diet started doing horrible things to the inside of my mouth, so we added that back in, and we both decided to keep fish for the protein (which is still a sacrifice, cause I hate fish). Aside from that, we’ve successfully eschewed all the good tasting foods for 20 days. Tomorrow at lunch will be 21, and we’ll celebrate by eating burgers until we can’t move, and then eating some more.
We, as a church, were challenged by our pastor to do this fast, so that we could re-direct our hunger towards God. This isn’t the first time he’s challenged me on it. A couple months ago in staff meeting, he excitedly told us all about this great new thing he was doing: “not eating!!” and wouldn’t we like to try it?! Of course I missed the point at the time — I like food. But when he challenged the church, he gave us a much better explanation of it. And, having never fasted before, we figured we’d take the challenge and see what God would do.
So that’s the background. The honest reality is, even though I’ve definitely been hungry, and its definitely made me talk to God more — mostly thoughts like “Dear God, I could really go for a steak right now” — I don’t feel like I’ve gotten any closer to Him. We were told if we wanted to experience God in an exciting new way, we should fast. But all I’ve really experienced is a feeling like there’s a hole in my stomach. People around me talk about what they’re learning through this, or how God is changing them, and I’m wondering what I’m doing wrong.
And I know I’m not the only one who feels this way. God doesn’t work on-demand, and just because we’re not eating, doesn’t mean God has to do amazing things in our lives. I know there are some for whom this is a huge sacrifice or a huge challenge, and I’m confident that God will honor them in a way that is appropriate to where they are in their walk in life. But I’m equally aware that God hasn’t worked any miracles in me or through me in the past 21 days.
But that doesn’t mean I’m not glad I did this. I am, in fact, very satisfied that I made it to 20 days — with or without a revolution in my life. And for those of you who disciplined yourselves through this fast, and didn’t feel the Holy Spirit moving, let me tell you why this was worth it. And I should note here, that this isn’t my discovery — rather, God hit me in the face with it during my devotions a couple days ago, and I’ve been waiting until the fast was over to post it. From My Utmost for His Highest (emphasis mine)…
. . . add to your faith virtue . . . —2 Peter 1:5
Add means that we have to do something. We are in danger of forgetting that we cannot do what God does, and that God will not do what we can do. We cannot save nor sanctify ourselves— God does that. But God will not give us good habits or character, and He will not force us to walk correctly before Him. We have to do all that ourselves. We must “work out” our “own salvation” which God has worked in us (Philippians 2:12). Add means that we must get into the habit of doing things, and in the initial stages that is difficult. To take the initiative is to make a beginning— to instruct yourself in the way you must go.

Faith without works isn’t worth much. It’s great to believe in something, but if you don’t act on it, it’s not very valuable. The fact is, many of the great leaders in the Bible had developed the discipline of fasting. God’s Word does not say that every time they fasted, a miracle happened. Sometimes it did, and we have many of those occasions recorded. But sometimes the Bible simply states that someone fasted. Great leaders, strong Christians in the Bible added to their faith with a humble act of obedience called fasting. And this is the important thing for me about this fast: obedience.
God doesn’t say: obey me, and I will make your life full of sunbeams and roses. He says: obey me.
He doesn’t promise that if you don’t eat meat, you’ll suddenly get a halo over your head. But He does promise to complete the good work He has started in you.
Beware of the tendency to ask the way when you know it perfectly well. Take the initiative— stop hesitating— take the first step. Be determined to act immediately in faith on what God says to you when He speaks, and never reconsider or change your initial decisions. If you hesitate when God tells you to do something, you are being careless, spurning the grace in which you stand.
We took up this fast expecting God to do something great. So far there are no angels singing heavenly hymns behind me. But I am proud that I have learned a discipline that Daniel, and Esther and even Jesus applied to their own spiritual lives. This is a tool in my arsenal now that I know how to use. It’s actually strange that I’ve been a Christian for over 20 years, and I’ve never learned to fast before… I knew the way — the Bible talks about it all over the place. But now that I’ve learned this discipline, when God tells me to fast, I know that I can act immediately on His instruction.
We have to get into the habit of carefully listening to God about everything, forming the habit of finding out what He says and heeding it. If, when a crisis comes, we instinctively turn to God, we will know that the habit has been formed in us.
There was no crisis in my life when I started this fast. Things are pretty good, and I’m pretty blessed. I didn’t need a miracle, and God didn’t deliver one. But I did need to learn how to act on my faith — so that when a crisis does come, I will know how to humble myself and trust Him.
But God will not give us good habits or character, and He will not force us to walk correctly before Him. We have to do all that ourselves…We have to take the initiative where we are, not where we have not yet been.
God doesn’t require us to fast. It’s not a prerequisite for getting into heaven, or to having a relationship with him. Even if we wanted to, we couldn’t sanctify ourselves through fasting. Rather, it’s a habit we take the initiative to develop, because God develops our character through obedience.

When I was young I loved to read. When my family lived in Bangladesh, our compound had pretty much the entire hardback set of Hardy Boys and Nancy Drew books, and I read them all — despite being 5. My dad read us the Narnia Series and the Hobbit when we were just little tykes, and I loved imagining myself on adventures like that. He seemed pretty determined to instill in us a love of literature, and to that end, we always had a great library of books on hand, and I read practically all of them.
Benjamin may be too young to buy toys for yet, but he’s not too young for us to start building a library for him to dive into just as soon as he’s interested. It may be a couple years, but I want to make sure he has no shortage of stimulation for his little brain. I, in no small part, attribute what success and ideals I’ve managed to capture in life to the knowledge, wisdom and creativity I’ve been inspired by in the pages writ by people smarter than myself, and I want Benjamin to have the same advantage my parents provided me.
The aforementioned Narnia Series (the first book of which was turned into a wonderous movie, which Ben will see after he reads it) and The Hobbit/Lord of the Rings books, are two sets that I’ve had in my library for a few years now — in case I should ever become a dad. But today I picked up another book no less fanciful, but with a careful tribute paid to the science it borrows its ideas from. One which, more than most other books I read as a child, led me think in ways totally new and fascinating and well beyond the normal ponderings of a small boy. It was called A Wrinkle in Time, and today I picked up a copy for my son. Along with imaginary lightsaber battles, and adventures exploring the backyard, I’m looking forward to the day my son and I can discuss the mind-bending details of this story together.
If you haven’t read it, ignore the fact that you’ll find it in the kids section. Pick it up and read it — I think you’ll find it sufficiently stimulating regardless of your age. I have every intention of re-reading it before I pass it on to Benjamin.

Ok for someone like me, me being Nicole, I really really hate spiders. Not sure why they just creap me out. After I see one I feel like it is crawling up my leg….ugh. Anyway in the last two days I have seen, so far, 6 spiders. And to top it off Jon wasn’t home for any of the sighting so I have to kill them since I couldn’t stand to know they were in the house. Now I don’t squash them normally, I just suck them up in the vacuum and leave it outside for Jon when he comes home…hehehe.

The worst kind I think are the black fuzzy ones that are about the size of a quarter….those really freak me out and we have had TWO in our bathroom so far. Oh and to top it off, like I mentioned earlier about the fear of one crawling up my leg well it happened last night when I was feeding Benjamin. I thought I felt something but every time I looked there wasn’t anything there except after like the fifth time looking there was one crawling over my foot so I grab a box near by and start pounding it but the thing would not die especially since it was on the carpet…after ten times it was finally dead!

• I was in the mall the other day with Benjamin, and a greeter at a store stopped me and said “You know there’s an amber alert? You should have a ID wrist band for your baby.” Pretty sure no one ever told me that in Canada.
• Friendly’s makes a really awesome bowl of clam chowder!
• There’s this guy I see every day (not saying where) who I think is convinced that he’s in like a porn movie or something. Every time I see him, he’s wearing a dress shirt with a gianormous collar, a whole bottle of cologne, and the greasiest hair product you’ve ever seen… and he always looks like he’s posing. Kinda like the Brian Howe look, only creepy…
• This weekend was widely varied, and somewhat crazy. I saw Spiderman 3 though (sorry Karl, I went without you) and it was pretty good.
• We got our Y membership on Saturday. Hope we get the chance to actually use it!
• I miss meat so much…

I’m glad we had a boy. I can’t wait until I can introduce him to Star Wars…
The other day I was in the mall, and they had a toy Tie Fighter, originally $30, marked down to $13. I almost bought it to put in Benjamin’s room… He’s not quite there yet though.
Is it cool to have fake lightsaber battles with your son? Cause I’m pretty sure we’re gonna get matching lightsabers…

On my last tank of gas, I set an incredible new record: 689km on 45 liters. That’s getting pretty close to 40 miles to the gallon. I attribute my success to: some extra highway driving, fixing my tire pressure, and finally getting my snow tires off (with the help of my good friend Jon Bates, since I’m too gimpy to do it myself right now).
Since Monday I’ve been getting more and more use out of my arm. I can lift things, open things, and hook-up cables (an important part of my life) with a fair bit of ease! The arm still looks nasty, but it’s coming along, and it feels great to be (somewhat) ambidextrous again!
Tonite we’re heading toward PA to meet up with a wonderful young couple that used to be in our small group at home — before they picked up and moved to Africa to be missionaries there. They’re back in North America for a brief furlough, due to political unrest (dangerous rioting) in the city they live in, and we’ve been trying for weeks to find an evening we were both free so we could hear their stories. I can’t wait to find out about what God has done in them and through them…

Well, it was years in the making, and the accumulation of germs ideas I’ve been holding on to for ages, but my home theater is finally done.
The TV is a 30″ HD, hooked up via HDMI-DVI to an Intel Mac Mini, a DVD Recorder, and my Dreamcast for the occasional game. The Mac is also hooked up to the receiver via Toslink for 5.1 surround, the Internet via the fastest available residential connection in the area, and to basic cable, via an Elgato EyeTV Hybrid.
For software I’m using FrontRow to play back our library of movies (mostly DivX rips from DVDs I purchased), music, and 5 years worth of photos, plus HD television downloaded using TVShows.app, which finds torrents and sends them to Transmission — the best Mac Torrent client out there. Elgato’s EyeTV software runs full screen and allows us to find, record and playback live TV, just like a PVR. And all that media is stored on a LaCie 320GB d2 Extreme drive connected over FireWire 400 (the drive rocks my sock, by the way). And I can control it all from my Logitech Harmony remote.
We can do everything we could with Digital Cable, and more. I even have a Folder Action script set-up to clean out downloaded shows after 2 weeks if I don’t archive them. And our total television bill is $8 a month — our Internet bill is up to $50, but we’re still saving $100 a month!
Addendum: and last night we place shifted a TV show (Law & Order, woo!) acquired in the living room, onto the 18″ monitor in our bedroom. It turns out that previous problems with doing so were related to the latency of the crappy external drive (or more accurately, the enclosure) I was using, and not the wireless network or the under-powered computer in our room (a G4 Cube running at 450Mhz) like I had suspected.
Phase 2 is to get communications going properly. I’ve ordered a gorgeous Bluetooth headset, that comes with a nice little dock, and I’m working on making Skype play nicely with a big screen (the main Skype window is too tiny to be useful on my TV).

I know Wednesday is a little late to be writing about the weekend, but this week has flown by, and I haven’t had much processing time.
Friday, our “adopted” sister Acasia arrived, via train, in New York.
Saturday we prepared the church for a huge baptism weekend.
Between Saturday and Sunday, across 5 services, over 80 people were baptized. The best thing about working at a church is seeing lives change. And this weekend, people lined up around the two sanctuaries, to get in a freezing cold pool, to tell everyone that they loved Jesus and that He had changed their lives. It was awesome, and tear jerking, and just such a great reward to be able to see that and participate in it.
Sunday afternoon, we got almost our whole crew together (although we did miss a couple of you) and headed to Poughkeepsie, NY for an awesome concert. The teens were a riot. We went grocery shopping for Daniel Fast-friendly food, then we went to Toys R Us to see how long it would take for them to get kicked out. I’m pretty sure the manager had a toy lightsaber up his butt, because it really didn’t take long, but that’s OK, cause we had a good time.
Benjamin went everywhere we went, and loved (almost) every second of it — although by the end of the weekend he was a little over-stimulated and we were very grateful to hand him off to Nate and his family who babysat for a couple hours while we recuperated.
Oh, and then on Monday morning, after another trip to the train station, I went to the doctor and got the last of my stitches and bandages removed. My arm looks pretty gross, but I can walk around with it unwrapped, for the first time in nearly 2 months, and it feels great — as long as nothing touches it. Another month or so and it should be mostly healed.